Making good choices

As a parent, one of my primary duties it to teach the Things how to make good decisions. Unfortunately it's not always easy for them, or for me.

My favorite comedian, Stephen Lynch, is in Milwaukee next weekend. I desperately wanted to go but my entertainment budget would not allow it. Last night I got a phone call from LawnBoy saying he had scored tickets and wanted to take me, JustAsFriends. And let me tell you, I was so damn excited. WooHoo, all I needed to do was convince my mom to watch the Things and I was set.

When I mentioned the tickets to Ex he gave me the AreYouOutOfYourFuckingMind look. And as he repeated the situation back to me, slowly, so my giddy woohoo saturated brain could comprehend, I realized he might be right. LawnBoy has not had much success with JustAsFriends in the past. Going to Milwaukee for the show was probably not a good idea (or quite possibly a very bad idea). I don't want to give LawnBoy mixed signals. That's not fair to him. And the last thing I want to do is make Buffett uncomfortable. So, I made up my mind not to go.

A little later I pulled into Buffett's driveway and reality smacked me upside the head. Even if Ex hadn't said a word, despite the fact that it really would have been nothing, I just couldn't do that to Buffett. As I was getting ready to leave Buffett's house I discovered a text from LawnBoy saying that if I changed my mind he had reserved a hotel room with a jacuzzi. OMG and HolyCrap!

So, I'm definitely not going and that's OK. I still have YouTube.

NOT WORK SAFE PEOPLE!

I hate the word Butch

Ever since I moved to Madison I have been longing to go to the local hookah bar. Seriously, it's a hookah bar. How fun would that be? Tons of fun, I was convinced. I mentioned it to at least 20 different people saying that it's something I wanted to experience just once. I'm that kind of person. I love the random experiences in life and I want to try them all.

Saturday I had my chance and it turned out to be more awesome than I ever imagined. You see, it's not just a hookah bar, it's actually a gay hookah bar. A gay hookah bar with karaoke. A gay hookah bar with karaoke during Pride weekend. Fucking Awesome!

I was out with my cousin who was in pimp mode once again and after consulting with some of his lesbian friends on where he might find me some pretty ladies the Hookah came up. And so we went. On the drive over he kept trying to figure out what my type was. Butch or Lipstick? I didn't like the sound of either one. Lipstick just makes me think of overly slicked up high maintenance girlie girls. So not my thing. But butch? No. I want a woman who is a woman, not a man with an extra set of lips. What I discovered that night was that a gay man thinks that damn near every gay woman is butch. Of course every gay man I have ever met has been at least a little bit queenie in my opinion too. We all have our bias. But when I asked him how he would describe me and he came back with "a very feminine butch" I decided that I had absolutely had enough of that word. It's not complimentary. It brings to mind women who look more like men. Women who spit and wear flannel and don't shave. Nope. That word is officially being banned from my vocabulary. I have never been a fan of the word cunt. I have officially placed butch right up there with it. Do. Not. Like.

I met some fantastic people that night, gay and straight. I laughed so hard I almost cried many many times over. I cannot even begin to explain all the awesome of the night except to say that it contained big burly bear type men in teeny tiny Richard Simmons shorts calling my daah-llling.

Also, I have two dates this week. YAY

Bottoms Up

I have recently been asked to man several beer tents with the added perk of free beer, I think, or maybe they just said that to get me there. Whatever, WooHoo! Getting involved in my community should be fun. In addition to being a fund raising opportunity so I don't have to take out a second mortgage for my son's soccer addiction it will be a chance to meet more people in the small town where I live. I've been here for over 7 years and honestly the only people I know are the parents of my children's friends. Time to branch out a bit I think. A bonus, as I weather the shit storm that has hit my life recently a little beer numbness is always welcome.

If you're in the area of Cow Town, Wisconsin and can make it to a certain Blues festival outside of Madison next weekend, stop by and see me. I'll be ransoming beers on the late Friday night shift.

Hint, the price might be cheaper if you flash me or call me Sassy! Tongue kisses to anyone who does both.

Ps. I'm totally lying about the discount
PPs. I'm not lying about the tongue kisses
PPPs. Unless you are toothless and smelly. Then you have to buy ME a beer first.

A nonstop weekend of goodness

It's Monday and I'm not altogether pleased about that. My weekend was just too good for words and I don't want it to be over.

Friday night I went to watch the triplets play baseball. They are so darn adorable in their little uniforms.

Saturday I went to a concert at the park and then had boozey bonfire fun with some of my dearest friends.

Sunday was non-stop. I gave the message at my Mom's church. I always love having the chance to speak there. Such wonderful people. I was blessed. Lunch with my parents and a little gardening before heading over to have dinner with more friends. In case you all were wondering, hairy french lady boobs are the funniest thing EVER! I followed that up with a quiet night at the park listening to the waves, drinking wine and catching up with Mike. It was fantastic. I'm looking forward to seeing him again before he goes back to Chicago on Thursday. He said he might be able to come back up this weekend with his boat.

Monday, not nearly as much fun so far but with any luck I'll be watching more kid baseball tonight.

I hope y'all had a fantastic weekend too!

Days of Grace: 35 (Music Edition)

These are the songs that make me pause for just a minute everytime they pop up on my play list.

1. I love her sound. She is simply amazing. And her songs always seem to stroke a nerve for me.
2. Both of them - fantastic. But this pairing and this song. Takes me a bit surprise every time and I just have to stop...
3. How can you contain your inner diva when this comes on? You can't I say. Can't.
4. Mantra!
5. Because it's summer and this song is light and fluffy and makes me SMILE.

On repeat

This isn't a meant to speak to my exes. It's meant to speak to me.

It's time:



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