Wednesday, August 19, 2009

The day the earth stood still - Part 2

I checked in on Shimmy several times the following day just to make sure she heard a hundred times that I loved her and to make sure that she was ok. Later that night I got a phone call from SM explaining that Shimmy's counselor still felt that she was unstable and had convinced her to check herself into the children's mental hospital.

...OMG...

This week was a week that SM also had his triplets. And SM's ex-wife is satan. Just so you get a clear picture on that before I keep going. SATAN! EVIL WALKING!

While in the middle of a meeting the following day I got a phone call from SM. Normally I would have let that go to voicemail because I'm professional and shit but considering the situation I ducked out and took it. The hospital was concerned that Shimmy had TB and needed her to get a chest x-ray. Of course that could not be done at the kids-are-crazy facility but instead had to be done at the people-are-dying hospital many miles away. SM had his triplets and SATAN would not take them so he could drive Shimmy. So, he wanted to know if I would take her if he could get clearance from the insane asylum. OF COURSE. After getting all the right nods and okays I was on my way over to get Shimmy.

As soon as I walked into that place I wanted to grab her and run. From the outside it looked all pretty and grassy and well, sort of lovely tucked back in the trees. But inside the doors were big and metal and locked with buzzers and double pane bullet proof glass. The walls were white. The floors were white. Everything was so sterile and holy crap, I'd have wanted to kill myself if I had to stay there too long. You probably think I'm terrible for saying that considering the situation but really, it was that bad.

After springing her from the loony bin, my first order of business was to let her call her daddy (no cell phones in lock up) and then to feed her. Sure, we should have gone straight to the hospital but I knew she didn't have TB and she had been isolated in a white room with only a cot all day because ohnoesthecontamination. I wanted to give her a little extra time of freedom in fresh air that didn't smell of crazy.

Following her x-ray and a nod from the little man in the white coat saying she wasn't going to infect the world I knew it was time to take back. I was so sad. But when we got there, long after visiting hours were over, they said I could stay and talk with her for a while. Yay!!! We talked for a couple of hours until we were both yawning and the nurse said it was time for lights out. Hating to leave her, I walked out of the scary place and drove home in tears. She didn't belong there. How could a place like that help her? ARRGGG!!!!

Over the next few days she did get better. In fact she was given progressively longer "field trip" time away from nut house. We went shopping at the mall one night. We spent a day on state street and had a picnic at the park on the lake. At one point, she came back to my house where I let her shower and shave her legs because they don't allow scary things like razors and tweezers in hell. When she was out it was almost as if none of it had ever happened. Except that it did happen and we had to take her back. It was crushing.

Two days after she was at my house plucking her brows, Shimmy got to go home to stay. It was a little bit rough for her at first but she is so much better now. I still worry every day. I love her so much and the idea that a hurt so big she would want to end her life could be banging around in her chest makes me want to hold her and hug her forever. To not let the big bad world near such a wonderful girl. Alas, I can't do that. But Shimmy is strong. She will make it. She will make it to that amazing future I see in front of her. And I'll be there to watch her embrace it.

5 comments:

Steph said...

and now I am balling. She's so lucky to have you. I hope you're around to bail my kids out of whatever trouble they get into. But knowing me and pancake boy, it will probably be jail. Oh well.

SP said...

I'll be there honey, with bail or a shovel to bury the body.

DawgDyke said...

You.Rock.

Learning As I Go said...

your post brought me to tears. I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers. Wow, you are an amazing woman!

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