This is probably NOT what the Wedding Rings guy had in mind when he asked me to talk about his gorgeous loveley wonderful rings...
Thing1 still has the ring. (I however do not have pictures because until 3 days ago he thought he had lost the ring and that I would be mad because the Wedding Rings guy would be mad and make me pay eleventy kajillion dollars for not posting more pictures of the ring. Then, the ring was found. Hoorah.*) Last night, while out to dinner, Thing1's uncle noticed the ring and being the wonderful smart ass that he is (love him! ~ Hi Matty!) asked "Who are you married to?" To which Thing1 quickly responded: My Right Hand. I do not know whether he made the comment knowing full well what he was implying or if it took seeing his father and uncle's faces turning purple from laughter for him to realize what he had done. I don't think I like 13 anymore.
Not to be outdone, Thing2 proudly told his uncle (again, Hi Matty. Are you going to let me babysit your offspring some day?) that last week I hit him in the balls and made his tooth fall out. SIGH. OK, OK, while factual, my lovely Thing was being a bit misleading. The tooth was one we have been waiting to fall out. It was one the orthodontist was watching very carefully. It was hanging on by a spit thread. I did not knock out one of his firmly held teeth. Also, the balls were actually ONE ball. It was my big exercise ball that he was holding in his general ball region while seranading his brother with ACDC's Big Balls. I walked by mid-concert and while rolling my eyes, gave the thing a pop. This apparently startled my son so much his mouth closed quickly and the tooth broke loose. See, it's really not as bad as it originally sounded. No need to call CPS, I swear!
*I did not and will not receive any form of monetary compensation for pimping out Superior Wedding Rings. They sent me the ring and if I loved it, I would talk about it. I am not the one wearing it but I do still love it. It is regularly abused like only a 13 year old boy can do and there's not a scratch on it. It is shiny and gorgeous.