Friday, May 8, 2009

Apparently you can buy love

I have some very wonderful and loving women in my life who have lately been a little bit blunt about their opinions of my dating choices, past and present. There have been critiques, some rather harsh. There have been scattered bits and pieces of praise all held for the men that stuck around for a while. I would praise them too so that's all good. However, there was one reoccurring theme that shocked the ever loving fuck out of me. Money. Apparently is OK to add money to my list of deal breakers? From where did this craziness come from? What happened to finding true love? What happened to all the other mushy stuff? Compatibility and companionability and sitting on the front porch together when we are old and gray?

Considering my most recent conversation with my mother, it's ok for me to consider a partner (she actually conceded that she would not freak the fuck out if I started seeing a woman. Big steps people, big steps. Not that I have any idea where to actually meet women who love women.) - It's ok for me to consider finances when I'm evaluating the dating potential of someone but it is NOT ok to evaluate/anticipate sex. If my mother thought back to the years that she was single in her 30's she'd realize that her current priorities are ALL out of whack. I'm just sayin...

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Bill said...

I think money is okay to add to the list. Shallow or not, if you want someone who has money and end up with someone who doesn't, there will be issues down the road. You might as well be honest and break it off up front.

But I think financial compatibility is more important, since money comes and goes. If you're both relative cheapskates (like my wife and me) it works well. Or if you're both into similarly expensive toys it works. But if one is into spending and the other is into saving, that could be a problem. Or if you expect him to spend on one thing but he wants to spend on something else, that's going to be a problem too.

SP said...

Bill, I have never been a girl who let money motivate her heart/relationships. However, I think you are right, being compatible is so important. Especially when you are talking about sex! ;-)

Stacie's Madness said...

I don't want no bum...even if he is good in bed. Just sayin.