Friday, March 12, 2010

Funny thing is, he's even color blind

My guy... The man... you know, the one that has had me smiling like a fool but I've yet to really talk about much... There was that thing... only now there's no thing. So now I have nothing to hide behind and just have to admit that I'm feeling a little ridiculous over how silly and giddy this man makes me feel. No, I don't have a name for him yet. And since I'm pretty sure there are only 6 of you left still reading here and 5 of you hear me say his name ALL.THE.TIME.OMG.SHUT.UP.WOMAN!!!, coming up with a name right now is maybe not necessary. For today I'll just call him Tupac.

Tupac is an educated, well dressed, suburban boy with manners and class. He has a desk job and is trained well enough that being out with him in public is always a good experience. We're going to the ballet this weekend...

All right Sassy, what the hell. Why are you blathering about his presentability? You're talking too much. What are you hiding, woman???

OK, fine! Tupac grew up on a farm and has a deep and abiding love for John Deere tractors. A love so deep and twisted that he has John Deere plates, OMG! His salt and pepper shakers? Yep, also John Deere. He has an ancient decrepit rusted POS classic John Deere tractor in his garage that he wants to refurbish this summer. Yes, dear internet, I'm officially dating a Farm Boy. I'm actually having a lot of fun with that. He's the perfect balance of class, trash and sass for this city girl who was born into a very redneck family of... FARMERS (and then my mom went and married a farmer 10 years ago which sort of makes me the farmers daughter and isn't everyone turned on by the farmer's daughter? Yeah, I thought so. See why I can't talk about these things. I don't have time to be breaking the heart of every man who wants a roll in the hay with all my hotness. Things to do people. Things to do.). All that being said, you'd think we were a match made in plowing heaven. (Heh, Plow) But here's the problem. Remember all that talk of John Deere, which from here on out will be refered to as JD, because - I'm lazy. Setting aside the tacky factor of tractor dinnerware, my grandpa, who was THE farmer, drove red tractors.
JD = Green. Grandpa = Red.
See the problem? And the only way to work through a problem as two mature adults in a relationship is to mock each other over it, right?
So yesterday I put this up on Facebook:
And told him that it would be even MORE sexy if it were red.

Tupac then sent me this:
My John Deere lovin man went out and found me a RED tractor. Squeeee!!!!

And this is why I can't bring myself to talk about him. I sound like a complete moron!
I'm embarassed for myself.


Stacie's Madness said...

you are too cute.
love, er, um, likes a lot looks good on you. :D

and I must be that ONE reader that hasn't heard his real name...

(ps...sorry about "can't wait to read" on the fb...didn't think about it completly)

SP said...

It might look good on me but it feels kind of like a wedgie. Uncomfortable in a weird "can everyone else tell I have my underwear up my ass?" kind of way.

Steph said...

Um. Yeah. We can tell. This is the only reason you are QUIET on the goddamn web. Glad it's going well for you though, and I have to say I am slightly comforted by the reason you are going around posting opinions of tractor colors. Damn inconcerting for a bit, I tell ya.

soccermom said...

Isn't giddy such a g r e a t feeling? Enjoy!