Monday, June 9, 2008

My Heart

Two amazing boys growing up in the exact same family and yet so very different. Wonderful in their every difference. This was my love letter to Thing1, two years ago when he started Middle School.

It seems that every time I realize how much you have grown or changed, every time I see you succeed at something new; I think back to your beginning. When I realized I was pregnant, I was so very scared. I doubted that I was ready to be entrusted with such a precious gift, but God knew that we were ready for each other.

The day I first felt your little body move inside me I knew my life would never be the same. Your life, your needs, your growth and development would forever be more important than any of my own needs.

The day you were born I watched your father with tears pouring down his face as he held you for the first time. On that day, not only were you born, but a family was born. On that day, when you couldn’t even hold your head up and could barely open your eyes, you were creating a loving bond between all of us. You were healing hurts and laying the foundation for this fabulous group of goofy people we call family.

The day we found out that you would be a big brother; I couldn’t help but think how very lucky this new little life was… lucky to have you to depend on his entire life. No matter what happens, the two of you will always have each other.

The day you started school, I thought I was prepared. You certainly were. You were proud and brave and so excited for this new adventure in front of you. While I wanted desperately to follow you around and protect you from mean teachers, meaner students and all your play ground bumps and bruises; you walked away from me without a single fear. In truth you have always approached the new phases in your life that way. You are brave and strong. Each beginning is an adventure that you are thrilled to begin.

Your gentle heart and kind spirit was obvious from the very beginning. I have loved watching you grow and change mentally and physically, while that heart has remained constant and true.

In the past year your dad and I have noticed amazing changes in you. You are more mature, more confident, stronger but still just as gentle. It feels like before my very eyes you have begun to transform from a sweet and wonderful young boy into an amazing young man.

While being your mother is still surprising and scary; it is also a tremendous gift. You may not always feel like I’m the nicest mom in the world and you may not always want me to kiss you in front of your friends. That’s ok. When I’m at my meanest is when I’m trying so hard to be the Mom you deserve; the one who loves you enough to guide you away from wrong decisions even if it hurts. I’ll try not to embarrass you too much, but when my heart is bursting with pride it will be difficult to keep from kissing you and hugging you, no matter who is around.

Thing1, I love you more than words can ever express.

1 comment:

ƒåυνέ said...

Your letters are so touching. Your Things are lucky.

p.s. I tagged you for a Meme on my site.